yea..I feel horrible this night..
there are a lot of thinks in my mind..
about my life..yes..my complicated life..
it's hard for me to sleep every night, thinking about my self..
I'm looking for happiness, but I don't know how can I make it perfectly like I want, like my expectation..
I already have you, but that's not fix the problem, even I think you don't care about it
I' not a stupid person, you are not the last in my life, so I decide to indifferent..not to forget..maybe you're one of my problem...but, yea, I guess I'm wrong..I still try to believe your word "diam bukan berarti tak sayang"......
I have my friends, my best friends who can make me laugh, feel better, and forget it for a few minutes..I share with them, and they can make me stand again..they can make me believe that they will be there if I feel bad or happy..but just a few minutes..when I am alone, in my room, in the dark, I feel terrible and my mind can't stop to think about what will I do for my self and for the others and for my dream.....
I have my family, yea, they are the only one reason for me to survive..the only one reason for me to not doing something stupid, their smile make me want to step to the next day, next hope, I call it the future..but sometimes we have different assessment, I wanted something and I know it will be alright if I take it, but they didn't accept that and they never care about my feeling..
but I have my GOD 'ALLAH SWT'..he is the only one who know what I feel and the best for me..thanks GOD, BIG THANKS FOR YOU! you give me them..they who give colours in my life..
I'm not a person who can easily cry anywhere anytime, I admit that the hardest thing is cry..but you can keep my word..I will cry when I find my happiness..happy crying, not sad crying
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